He’s Joining The Military: Should We Get Married Before He Goes In?

This Question From Air Force LPN Programs | 11 Answers


QUESTION:

we have been together for 2 years. i am now 7 months pregnant.
i’ve been a struggling personal fitness trainer/aerobics instructor in a small town for several years. people just don’t have the disposable income for perks such as this anymore.
he’s been working on Diesel trucks for several years now – only making 11.50 an hour.
we are basically living in poverty.
knowing that we have to do something about our financial status now more than ever, i have started the LPN program and he insists he is going to the Air Force, but if he doesn’t score high enough, he says he will settle for National Guard or Coast Guard.
we don’t really have any other choices – jobs are leaving our area almost weekly. wal-mart has even put a freeze on hiring.
anyway, what i am wondering is, are there any advantages to being a married soldier? or does it matter either way?

11 Comments so far

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  1. paul C on December 24, 2009 9:48 pm

    HELL YES YOU GET PAID MORE!!!
    free health care, dental for you. baby and him.
    free housing! Make sure you get off base housing because its usally cheaper then on base (on-base housing takes your whole housing allowance, off base cant)
    NOT TO MENTION!!!
    HIGHER PAY FOR HIM and plenty of jobs for you on base. you could even be a PT at the base gym (if you can handle macho men hiting of you)

  2. lady in love with a soldier on December 24, 2009 10:09 pm

    i know what you mean me and my family are kinda in the same boat just get married u get alot more and u have a kid on the way even better i live in nyc which things are bad. i just lost my job few days ago but think god i am going to the army soon for 19 D tell him to go to the army i have one year old baby girl and a boy on the way
    i ship out this year for us army =] 19 D MOS

  3. Christop on December 24, 2009 10:53 pm

    Go for it, but do it before it is less stressful and you will have to bee supported. I’m also in the same situation like you guys. Good luck to both of you and I will pray for you both

  4. Wilbert on December 24, 2009 10:59 pm

    i do believe they get more allowances for housing and clothing and you would be able to live with him on a base for free and also have his benefits such as medical and such. This is only what i heard so your best bet would be talking with a recruiter.

  5. Rob on December 24, 2009 11:27 pm

    Yes they do get paid more, but only while on Active Duty. The National Guard does not qualify as Active Duty, other than when they are deployed.

  6. Ed J on December 24, 2009 11:31 pm

    YES they get paid for. And if he goes in as active duty you will be covered by tricare (free medical insurance) and so will the birthing of your child.

  7. Khrystyn on December 24, 2009 11:33 pm

    yes because he makes more money and u qualify for housing and other stuff.

  8. dean on December 25, 2009 12:20 am

    I would recommend getting married before he goes in to take advantage of the benefits he will receive as a married person with dependents. But when people refer to these benefits as “free” they are misspeaking. Nothing is free in the military. Servicemen and women serve their country and place their lives on the line every day and their benefits are earned. Their basic pay is not the same as they would receive in the civilian sector, but the benefits are not taxable and are superb. “Free” is what people who do not work and sit at home waiting for handouts get, and saying that the benefits our military get is free is disrespectful and just plain incorrect.
    Good luck to you and your family.
    Chief Petty Officer
    U.S. Navy, Retired

  9. Chief on December 25, 2009 12:25 am

    First off. You have shown very poor judgment in getting pregnant all the while knowing that you are not in a financial position to support a child. Now don’t give me that old “it was an accident”. Being a fitness trainer had to automatically expose you to the cause and prevention of pregnancy. Women talk !
    Secondly, If you are getting married for money, your marriage will fail. what will you do when someone comes along who makes more money than your husband. His sargent will automatically be making more money. Will you leave your husband for his sargent. While you say no no no. I suspect your husband will wonder wonder wonder.
    Finally, Yes your husband will receive allowances for you. Additionally, after completion of basic training he will be entitled to living allowances for housing and food. You and the children will receive health care. I am not sure about you being eligible for health care immediately since due to the late stage of your pregnancy. These are questions he should be asking the recruiter. Tell him to be honest with the recruiter and recruiter will gladly explain the benefits to which he will be entitled, including the benefits for you and children of your marriage.

  10. oldbull on December 25, 2009 12:39 am

    If you know you want to be with him- Yes get married before hand, then you will be covered under his medical and all that stuff. Not to mention once he is stationed you will get base housing. Oh, and on top of that he will be paid more.
    Just remember that having a long distance relationship is hard, sure it wont be forever, but the military makes things even more difficult.
    Oh, and someone in the air force isn’t a solider.. They are an Airman ;)

  11. Noble on December 25, 2009 1:23 am

    If you guys want a more stable lifestyle with pay, benefits and housing….go active duty. If he goes NG you will not have full benefits or full time pay…..only when called upon for orders. Active Duty will provide the means to make a better life for you two.
    And yes do get married before he enlists. He will get a housing allowance or BAH, health care for you and the child and a bit more extra pay for a dependent. (However it is set; do not expect to get more money with more kids). Good luck. Hope it works out.